“God’s commands are not merely demands, they are invitations– invitations to fullness of life. They are not merely obligations, they are opportunities. They are not merely precepts, they are promises. ’I set before you the way of life and the way of death,’ God says. The way of life requires obedience to the commands in His Word and the way of death is assured by disobedience to them.”
Wayne Mack
“So often we are troubled with a persistent sin only because it disturbs our peace and makes us feel guilty. We need to focus on it as an act of rebellion against God…Godly sorrow is developed when we focus on the true nature of sin as an offense against God rather than something that makes us feel guilty. Sin is an affront to God’s holiness, it grieves His Holy Spirit, and it wounds afresh the Lord Jesus Christ. It also gratifies Satan, the archenemy of God. Dwelling on the true nature of sin leads us to godly sorrow, which in turn leads us to repentance.”
Jerry Bridges
“The Bible is far more than a rulebook to follow. It is primarily the message of God’s saving grace through Jesus Christ, with everything in Scripture before the cross pointing to God’s redemptive work and everything after the cross– including our sanctification–flowing from that work.”
Jerry Bridges
“When we sin we are more vexed at the lowering of our self-esteem than we are grieved at God’s dishonor. We are surprised and irritated at our own lack of self-control in subjecting ourselves to unworthy habits….The first cause of this is self-love, which is unable to stand the disappointment of not seeing ourselves in time of trial come out beautiful, erect, and admirable.”
Frederick W. Faber
I, mild-mannered, makes-a-complete-stop-at-every-stop sign—Ann Maree, have been the recipient of road rage. There I was, mindin my own business, waiting to turn right at a stoplight. In the cross lane of traffic was a ‘gentleman’ waiting to turn left onto the street in which I was sitting–or so I thought. The traffic subsided and I took my RIGHT OF THE WAY turn when….HONK!!!! HONK honk HONk HoNk Honk HONK!!!!!! Apparently the gentleman was doing a U turn, not a LEFT turn, and I was in HIS way. Now his honking, obnoxious response would have been bad enough, however what happened next floored me. As I proceeded in the center lane, the ‘gentleman’ gunned his SUV and merged from the right lane directly in front of me. He cut me off. Stunned, I slammed on my brakes and successfully avoided a collision. I could not believe someone would use a 4000lb vehicle to retaliate; particularly when they were in the wrong! I crawled slowly forward in an effort to steer completely clear of his car, and watched as he rode up the tail of yet another unsuspecting victim; HONK!!!! HONK honk HONk HoNk Honk HONK!!!!!!
Southern hospitality.
Never one to throw away a perfectly good illustration, I drove to my destination deep in review. Was I in the wrong? No, every stoplight I passed included a sign that indicates those making a U turn must yield. When I threw my arm (arm, not finger!) up in the air from utter shock, did I provoke the driver to respond as he did? No, his melodic honking reaction occurred first. While my knees knocked down the highway I came to the conclusion that it happened. It just happened.
It was, however, an excellent opportunity for me to evaluate my ‘actions,’ what I do and what I do not do. “Time and again the Bible emphasizes the importance of our actions. ‘Who is the man who desires life, and loves length of days that he may see good? Keep your tongue from evil, and your lips from speaking deceit. Depart from evil and do good; seek peace and pursue it.’ Ps 34:12-14” THIS time I reacted well. That’s not to say I would EVERY time, however God graciously gave me this experience as an opportunity to evaluate myself.
Isn’t He amazing?
Since beginning this trek of eradicating the sin that hinders my motivation, God has provided the above circumstance (collecting data: action), an under-active thyroid diagnosis (collecting data: medical) and the ability to MEMORIZE (don’t fall over, Wendy) 7…..SEVEN verses in James (collecting data: resources)
By the way, He then used those very verses the next day to counsel me…more on that tomorrow.
Let’s repeat….ISN’t HE AMAZING?
“Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you.” James 4:8
“Biblical counseling is not primarily about making people happy or successful or fulfilled; it is not mainly about eliminating the emotional distress, the pain and hurts that people experience. Of course biblical counselors are concerned about these things, and, in fact, all of these desirable things and many more will happen in the fullest sense through biblical counseling. They are not, however, the main concern of biblical counselors; rather they are the byproducts of accomplishing the real purpose of biblical counseling, which is to promote holiness and biblical living as a life-style and thereby to help people be transformed into the image of Christ in every aspect of life.” John MacArthur
…..The first step in producing the heart change that God requires is, as author and Pastor Jay Adams says, “an awareness of God’s requirements.”
“The mind is renewed when, under the influence of the Spirit, the truth is understood and believed, so as to displace the ignorance and error that previously prevailed. It is the truth, understood and believed, that purifies the heart from the love of the world; and, just in proportion as that truth is understood and believed, are men transformed. It is by men’s being formed to a right way of thinking, that they are formed to a right way of feeling and acting with regard to this world and the next–To God, and or brethren of mankind.” (emphasis mine)
John Brown
Ever hear of UPRR? Let me phrase that differently; ever have a surprise (good surprise) fall at your doorstep the moment you needed it most? This, perhaps, is the most accurate way to describe our year.
What began as a great adventure, moving south and widening our wealth of relationships, quickly turned literally south with the onset of a world-wide financial crisis and closer-to-home banking catastrophe. Here we were, living far from ‘home’ and family, in a house we had no chance of selling, facing the indiscriminate potential of job lay-offs, in a town that revolves around the bank industry. To use the term Hopeless was inadequate, to say the least. And although Bob surfaced from the initial firestorm unscathed, our income did not. Banking became the new pariah profession and the word ‘bonus’ America’s archenemy.
Never mind the average, never-saw-the-initials-MIL-on-their-paycheck Banker’s salary is part bonus; similar in structure to the commission a salesman receives. (ok…I’m sorry…I just had to do it. Please forgive me, I will get off this soap box I tripped over…)
Anywho…we quickly reevaluated life, our budget, our spending habits, my work potential and laid everything before the Lord. This passage, from the NIV commentary on Haggai, became our mode of operation.
“Experience of hardship should always become opportunities for spiritual reflection in our lives, turning us heavenward to ask hard questions. The various psalms of disorientation in the Psalter encourage us to ask God about the hardships that enter our lives. These questions are not expressions of rebellion, but rather the honest voice of a child reliant on a parent. Such questions, however, should be accompanied by questions directed inward as we ask God to search us for those areas that do not reflect the priorities of the kingdom.”
And there was, quite frankly, a certain amount of repentance necessary. We had become careless, ‘self’ rather than ‘other’ focused, unwise. We needed to ask for the Lord’s forgiveness and re center our lives, particularly our financial lives.
Unfortunately, try as we might, we could not slim down or skim enough of our financial commitments to fit into our new pay scale. We came up short. So I dutifully set to working on a resume; something I have never had to do before! And with good reason…there was SO LITTLE I could put on it! The bulk of it was filled with unpaid self-employed entrepreneurial endeavors and volunteer experience. I’ve never even brought home a paycheck! Well, ok, there was that one year when I worked at Lord & Taylor. But those paychecks inevitably came home in a beautiful ‘LT’ engraved shopping bag.
By what seemed like immediate grace of God pouring down on us, two potential job opportunities appeared! And immediately both opportunities disappeared. No positions in my skill set emerged on the daily onset of job listing email I requested and, short of posting my silly lil resume on the Internet, I backed off. Apparently a job for me was not the way God intended to provide.
My mission became finding ways to trim wherever I could. I sold some things on Craigslist, started menu planning and shopping sales with coupons. Coupons became my best friend, I regularly had to GO BACK home because I forgot them and fogettabout paying full price!
To no avail. We were still short.
I have to admit my faith faltered. I believed that God would provide, yet not seeing how that would happen left me lost; I incorrectly thought success in this situation would need to be my hard work. God would necessarily need to work through me to produce His provision.
I questioned everything. “Why did we move here?” “Why did we move from our old house?!” “Why did we buy THIS house?” “What should we have done differently, and how do we change it now?”
And then it happened. God moved. And let me tell you, God moves in thee most mysterious ways! Apparently our relocation messed up our taxes the previous year in a big way. Now, here’s the punch line; God used the IRS to get us closer to a balanced budget. Go figure.
…and UPRR? Well, I’m hear to tell you that there really are (as you hear about on infomercials) people who have Unclaimed Property out there; and we are one of them!
Before ya’ll run to your cell phones to see about getting in on our newfound riches you must know that yes, God has provided for us greatly and blessed us beyond measure. And part of the joy we find in this, and the way we give Him glory, is that He has given us exactly what we need (no more, no less).
While I contemplate my answers for the “Collecting Data” portion of Counseling the Incompetent Counselor I am reminded of how God moved mightily in our previous situation. It causes me to ponder how, instead of me again putting on a ‘pull-up-your-bootstraps’ mentality (this time for discipline and motivation), God would instead change my heart. And in an effort to discover this process I am supplementing Counseling with How to Help People Change, by Jay Adams.
The first step in producing the heart change that God requires is, as author and Pastor Jay Adams says, “an awareness of God’s requirements.”
To be continued….
Once again I sit in front of my computer and my eyes glaze over. Once again I try to focus on the numerous tasks screaming at me from my Franklin Planner and instead surf the Internet. Once again I have no clue what I am doing, or even why I should do anything at all.
Hence it is the beginning of another day.
This time of life is filled with great relief and great emptiness. Oh, how I longed for the day when our kids would at last demand less attention. Painstaking hours of bottles and diapers grew ever so slowly (or so it seemed) into endless boxes of macaroni and cheese and life lived from a mini van. “Mom look at what I made!” coupled together with daily bedtime stories and the most wonderful, sweet kisses. Agonizing arguments made my head spin with frustration while Band Competitions, Homecoming festivities, and graduation infused pride and excitement.
And now they’re gone.
And I don’t know what to do with my time.
Don’t get me wrong! I have PLENTY to do, as my planner so adequately reminds me. I spent our first years after moving here volunteering for everything I was capable of; I apparently am now on “the list.” It succeeded in getting me out of the house and I was fortunate to have established some wonderful, blessed relationships while experiencing the joy of doing what I love. My to-do compass that flips the pages of my days overflowith.
What I don’t have is the motivation to do it.
When our family was growing and life moved at a hectic velocity I had clear goals, an accountable pace. Without that discipline I, Ms. Discipline (they-used-to-call-me “Ann al”), have become sloth.
One of my new dear friends and I have compared notes on this dilemma and regularly encouraged each other to daily pull that incentive from thin air; to do as Elizabeth Elliot proclaims, “the next thing.” (Ellen DeGeneres in Finding Nemo says it too… “swimmin! swimmin! Just keep swimmin!” Somehow hearing it from Elliot feels a whole lot more holy)
And it works. Some days.
But quite honestly, most days look more like this….
10. Check computer
11. Change music
12. Eat
13. Check computer
14. Lunchtime!
15. Read favorite blogs
16. One more, before-I-really-should-do-something Check computer
17. Gotta get outta this house – run around town and do some errands
18. Return home and put items away
19. Check computer
20. Answer emails/phone calls
21. Start Dinner
Sloth
So as I sat in prayer before God yesterday I realized that this might be a problem (DUH!) The next step in my effort to Counsel the Incompetent Counselor is designed to get at the “heart” of that problem. In order to do this, Wayne Mack suggests we must first collect data. Many a “counselor” has rushed into judgement (and solutions!) of a root problem they assume existed only to discourage their counselee. Mack uses a really great example from the Bible to illustrate this problem; “When Eli saw Hannah’s lips moving but heard no sound, he assumed she was drunk and condemned her without so much as smelling her breath.”
Don’t be sniffen my breath.
Over the next day or so, my goal will be to honestly evaluate these 6 data;*
Stay tuned…
*Disclaimer: this lil experiment is REALLY just for fun (are we having fun yet?) and will follow closely along the information found in the book Counseling as well as other counseling resources. It is not recommended that the reader should try this on their own at home without the book! 
Well, I am about 1/3 of the way through the book Counseling and I have decided I need it. Counseling, that is. I got to the chapter called Spiritual Discipline and the Biblical Counselor, read the high calling of those who choose to speak into another’s life, and determined that yes, I fall seriously short (no surprise).
“Biblical counselors must have a growing relationship with the Lord, must be growing both in knowledge of and obedience to the Word of God, and must be aware of their potential to sin.”
The chapter outlines eight essential elements of spiritual discipline so that our encouragement to others for change and growth will be made more effective by our own growing model of the same. A growing relationship with Jesus Christ includes the following;
Equally important in this growth is our relationship with others, our relationship with our family and spouse, and our relationship with ourselves.
My immediate reaction to this information (as seen above!) is “whew! heavy!” and “how!” The burden seemed almost overwhelming. However having read the beginning of the book, I am fully aware that it will not be because of my efforts that I grow, rather “only the Spirit can give the necessary insight and motivation for permanent change.”
Therefore….and I commit to this with fear and trepidation….I am going to use the principles set forth inCounseling, and…. counsel myself! And….to make it even more fun…I am going to BLOG about it as I do!
And you thought there was enough reality in media. Just think how lame a blog on weight loss looks now. Now where to begin…there is, after all, a lot of ground to cover in this Christ-likeness endeavor….
Day 1 Counseling the Incompetent Counselor
Pray. First and foremost I must get before the Father and ask Him to reveal to me the areas where I have replaced Him in my heart. Even though I may recognize where God is not supreme, only He can show me the root –the sin- that takes the place of Him.
I’ll let you know how it goes…
(so do you suppose I should file this blog in “Daily Demotions” or “Stuff You Don’t Really Need to Know?” hmmmm)
 | Arielle on Nice People or New Men? |
 | Meg on His Unwavering Agenda |
 | Paula Onxley on His Unwavering Agenda |
 | annmareewilson on His Unwavering Agenda |
| annmareewilson on His Unwavering Agenda |
